Bailouts 'R US(A)
Welcome to the USA, the land of the bailout. Sure, we believe in free markets, we believe in capitalism and goldilocks and all that good stuff. That is, until our stocks and our houses start declining in value. Why, then we need the government to rush in to the rescue... IMMEDIATELY.
We're so pathetic these days that we'll scream for a bailout all over national television, we'll send our largest banks to foreign countries to plead for their own bailouts, we'll send our president to saudia arabia to beg for a bailout by means of cheaper oil. We'll do anything, ANYTHING, to keep our stocks and our homes from dropping in value. Especially during an election year!
No politician can resist a good sob story about how some poor sop is getting foreclosed on because they didn't understand what an adjustable rate loan was. Why, these poor fools were just taken advantage of by mean old corporations. They couldn't have been expected to know any better now could they?
And speaking of those mean old corporations, why, they are just poor sops themselves aren't they? I mean, everyday one of them is writing off $10 billion or so. You think if they were so cruel and savvy, they could've made themselves some money in the process. Nope. Only the great orange one figured out a way to walk out with enough money to keep himself permanently tan for the next 20,000 years.
So, where do we stand? We've got so many bailouts in process that it's hard to keep them straight:
We've got Paulson who attempted a Super SIV that is now a super fizz.
We've got Bush who is busy writing everyone an $800 check in hopes that they'll go to Disneyworld and buy another iPod.
We've got Hillary who thinks freezing foreclosures and interest rates and giving poor people more food stamps is a good way to get the economy humming again.
We've got Bernanke lecturing congress on how to do a bailout correctly (like he knows) and announcing to the world at every chance that he stands ready to cut rates aggressively, yet he is still waiting (much to the markets chagrin).
We've got congress busily crafting bailout based legislation that they'll surely load down with more pork than your local Dennys.
Then we've got Romney, Obama, Huckabee, Edwards, and McCain all out there with their own attempt at attention grabbing bailout plans.
Since when did we become the nation of the government bailout? And why is this so generally accepted as a good idea and not questioned? Someday soon we'll reach for our national credit card and the card will be declined.
